Tuesday, 21 August 2012

Stairlift to Heaven....

This morning I found my eldest slowly shuffling up the stairs on her bottom one stair at a time. We have a townhouse so there are a lot of stairs. "What are you doing?" I asked.
"I'm seeing what it would be like if we had a machine like Nan's that can carry me up the stairs without moving." So my daughter now wants us to install a stair lift... Well, Papa would be pleased, he has been planning for one for ages!

We have had a bit of a bumpy day today, a final visit from the boy's social worker, a trip to therapy and a review of where the therapy is going. For both children this is pretty traumatic but I was so proud of them both. They bravely answered all their questions and the eldest was commended for her maturity and fortitude when talking with her therapist about some of the more difficult things that happened in her past. She isn't yet ready to share these things with us yet, but we know that one day she will... I dread that day.... Mainly because my anger with her birth family will probably be uncontainable...

I now sit in on TJ's therapy and today we were focussing on the forthcoming move. After much chat it was revealed that despite his intense dislike for the family cat (now missing for nearly three weeks) he is incredibly concerned that once we move the cat won't be able to find us. This probably ties into his own abandonment issues but at the same time it reveals his empathetic nature... Which most of the time he conceals.

We also talked about what he is looking forward to when we move. "I'm going to get a rabbit." He told the therapist. "Oh, that's nice, " she replied, "What colour rabbit would you like?"
"Red." came the curt reply. "I'm not sure they come in red." she said. "Mine will," he told her, "because I'm getting an Arsenal rabbit and Lea is getting a giant hamster!" I thought about this for a while, this being the first time I had heard about the hamster requirement. Then the penny dropped, "a guinea pig!" I shouted, as if I was a contestant on some daytime game show, "he means a guinea pig!" I beamed at the therapist. She gave me a withering look, "I had worked that out, " she said.

We went on to what TJ could do when he feels angry, as opposed to self harming or punching Daddy - which are his usual outlets. "I could play in my sand pit." he said helpfully, "... but it hasnt any sand in it, " he added. Apparently, Lea wanted to make a beach for beach volleyball last week and tipped the sand out over the driveway. I wondered what that was...... So we are now committed to a new sandpit, a rabbit and a guinea pig when we move.... Therapy is an expensive business.....l

TJ asked today why Papa doesn't have long summer holidays like he does."Well, " I told him,"It's because Papa has to work really hard to make sure we have a nice house,enough food and big holidays, like when we went to Disney." He thought about this and said, "no, it's because he likes to play football all day." I was stunned was I, in fact, married to a premier league football player.... No, it's because the bank where Papa works sponsor the Premier league and as such, TJ is convinced that Papa is some kind of major player in footballing circles.... Let's see how that pans out as the kids get older....

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