So today I want to focus on KC and the positive turn his life has taken.
Again I don't want to jinx things and I apologise if it appears as though I'm gloating - I'm not. As you know it has been a struggle and I'm hoping that you will see that there can be light at the end of what appears to be a very long and endless tunnel.
When we decided that school really wasn't working for KC we made a huge decision to home school for a while - whilst we sorted out a suitable placement for him. KC has an Education and Health Care Plan (which used to the the Statement of Special Educational Needs) and, by law, is entitled to an education that meets his specialised needs. Unfortunately, therapeutic schools are few and far between and are costly - with local authorities struggling to balance their books etc, it does seem to be the SEN kids that are being ignored. It is easier to leave them struggling in mainstream schools - or being constantly excluded and then home schooled than it is to find and fund a suitable school placement.
KC was lucky in that I was able to give up my job and focus on battling the Local Authority to get him the help he needed. I could never have done it and held down a full time job. Not with tribunals and legal stuff and seemingly endless paperwork having to prove a need that is already recorded in the plan.
Plus, KC needed therapy - desperately. So we took the year out. We homeschooled with a tutor who came three times a week, we had therapy in place and we let KC just be himself for a year. I always think if you are going to miss a year of secondary school then Year 8 is the one to miss. Just entering the dreaded teens, not quite sure of your own identity, easily led astray and still not ready to make decisions about GCSE options etc.
In KC's case it was a good move.
With the help of the virtual head (the person responsible for the education of all children still in care and those who have been adopted from care) we were able to identify a therapy school. With an amazing post adoption worker we were then able to access the therapy KC needed and the reports he required to get a place at said school. School then offered him a place and the Local authority refused to fund it. So we took them to tribunal. The day before we agreed to meet to mediate - they backed down and agreed a placement for KC at the school. This was in May of this year - only they couldn't start till September. But it gave us something to aim for.
Shortly after, TJ started to refuse to go to his mainstream school. So I had both boys at home. I had just finished one battle to get KC sorted and now began another to get TJ a school that met his needs. Which meant that we had to go back to the drawing board and work out what those needs were and then, more importantly, provide proof of those needs.
But, we then decided that rather than stress everybody out - what we would do is simply start the boy's summer holidays a few weeks early. They could both chill and gain some breathing space, whilst I sorted out the next steps.
Come July, both boys had school placements for September and we really could let the holidays begin.
KC has now been at his school for nearly a full half term and, thankfully, he loves it!
He did comment that he was no longer the 'naughtiest' boy in school but that seems to have helped his self confidence. Neither child brings any home work home - so that has been a huge relief on the stress levels in the house.
KC only goes to lessons he wants to - but surprisingly, he attends a lot by choice - because... he enjoys them. He talks about comic books and graphic novels in English, he learns about finances and shopping in maths, he plays drums in his music lesson,he helps out with abused animals at a local shelter as part of Life Skills, he goes mountain biking and swimming for his PE and loves to learn how to cook on a Friday. It's been a huge eye opener - and although I understand its not an education that would work for everyone (TJ would hate it as he needs structure to his day), for the child who has suffered hideous trauma in his formative years to be able to make choices is incredibly empowering.
No, he may not get handfuls of GCSE's and he may not attend University - who knows? But then I don't think he would have achieved those in mainstream schools either. But what we do have a is a happy 13 year old, who leaves the house at 7.30 every morning with a smile on his face. And that is enough for me.
Again I don't want to jinx things and I apologise if it appears as though I'm gloating - I'm not. As you know it has been a struggle and I'm hoping that you will see that there can be light at the end of what appears to be a very long and endless tunnel.
When we decided that school really wasn't working for KC we made a huge decision to home school for a while - whilst we sorted out a suitable placement for him. KC has an Education and Health Care Plan (which used to the the Statement of Special Educational Needs) and, by law, is entitled to an education that meets his specialised needs. Unfortunately, therapeutic schools are few and far between and are costly - with local authorities struggling to balance their books etc, it does seem to be the SEN kids that are being ignored. It is easier to leave them struggling in mainstream schools - or being constantly excluded and then home schooled than it is to find and fund a suitable school placement.
KC was lucky in that I was able to give up my job and focus on battling the Local Authority to get him the help he needed. I could never have done it and held down a full time job. Not with tribunals and legal stuff and seemingly endless paperwork having to prove a need that is already recorded in the plan.
Plus, KC needed therapy - desperately. So we took the year out. We homeschooled with a tutor who came three times a week, we had therapy in place and we let KC just be himself for a year. I always think if you are going to miss a year of secondary school then Year 8 is the one to miss. Just entering the dreaded teens, not quite sure of your own identity, easily led astray and still not ready to make decisions about GCSE options etc.
In KC's case it was a good move.
With the help of the virtual head (the person responsible for the education of all children still in care and those who have been adopted from care) we were able to identify a therapy school. With an amazing post adoption worker we were then able to access the therapy KC needed and the reports he required to get a place at said school. School then offered him a place and the Local authority refused to fund it. So we took them to tribunal. The day before we agreed to meet to mediate - they backed down and agreed a placement for KC at the school. This was in May of this year - only they couldn't start till September. But it gave us something to aim for.
Shortly after, TJ started to refuse to go to his mainstream school. So I had both boys at home. I had just finished one battle to get KC sorted and now began another to get TJ a school that met his needs. Which meant that we had to go back to the drawing board and work out what those needs were and then, more importantly, provide proof of those needs.
But, we then decided that rather than stress everybody out - what we would do is simply start the boy's summer holidays a few weeks early. They could both chill and gain some breathing space, whilst I sorted out the next steps.
Come July, both boys had school placements for September and we really could let the holidays begin.
KC has now been at his school for nearly a full half term and, thankfully, he loves it!
He did comment that he was no longer the 'naughtiest' boy in school but that seems to have helped his self confidence. Neither child brings any home work home - so that has been a huge relief on the stress levels in the house.
KC only goes to lessons he wants to - but surprisingly, he attends a lot by choice - because... he enjoys them. He talks about comic books and graphic novels in English, he learns about finances and shopping in maths, he plays drums in his music lesson,he helps out with abused animals at a local shelter as part of Life Skills, he goes mountain biking and swimming for his PE and loves to learn how to cook on a Friday. It's been a huge eye opener - and although I understand its not an education that would work for everyone (TJ would hate it as he needs structure to his day), for the child who has suffered hideous trauma in his formative years to be able to make choices is incredibly empowering.
No, he may not get handfuls of GCSE's and he may not attend University - who knows? But then I don't think he would have achieved those in mainstream schools either. But what we do have a is a happy 13 year old, who leaves the house at 7.30 every morning with a smile on his face. And that is enough for me.
Wow, what a wonderful sounding school! So glad the boys are both happy in their new schools - you all deserve it after some difficult times!
ReplyDeleteIt does seem to be doing a good job with a lot of children who have suffered some terrible trauma in their past. We are pleased he got a place. Thank yo for all your support.
DeleteSo pleased to hear that things are going well. The boys are lucky to have found you both.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I'm hoping we have turned a corner now.
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